Learning disability...?

A few weeks ago I sang these lines by Third Day: //please take from me my life when I don’t have the strength to give it away to You//, Jesus. That was my prayer. Yet I find myself sitting here today, so angry with God. Am I so fickle? I am like a three year old girl having a temper tantrum because things aren’t going her way, or like the little kid who clings obstinately to the edge of the baby blanket he knows he can’t take to school with him. How many times do I have to learn this lesson!?!!! I suppose the answer is a logical one…”until I actually get it”! But oh how I hate these situations which bring about the painful realization that Jesus is the only thing, the only one, in this entire world who we can depend on, the only one who won’t change, who won’t leave, who won’t lie, who won’t hurt us, who will love us unconditionally. Jesus is the ONLY one in whom we can confidently place our trust, the only one worthy of it. Everyone else, everything else, will only let us down.

Somehow I just can’t reconcile this fact with life.